Preparing My Easel

Personal revelation (v.): the act of acknowledging and then coming to terms with an aspect of your personal being that you were unaware of or unwilling to admit

Stage One: Excitement - Characterized by a titillating desire to share the new news. This desire stems from a personal pride in resolving a portion of your identity and then wanting to share that with those who matter to you the most.

Stage Two: Anxiety - This stage occurs when one realizes that they have admitted the existence of this new facet of their live to themselves and/or to others. The anxiety derives from being unable to repress again the conclusion that has been enlightened. Even if it ends up being a false realization, it still has existed in some form in the realm of the personal.

Stage Three: Self-Loathing - The language of this stage focuses on attacking the self for acknowledging and the labeling the revelation that is causing the anxiety. The hatred comes mostly from the realization that there is no way to go back to a place of unknowing. This state is also where, if the personal realization is true, the person will start beating themself up for their shift in identity.

Stage Four: Exile - A shift from the self-loathing stage occurs when the person begins to try and analyze the issue or development on his or her own. The person decides that the only way to get answers on what is true about their identity is to look at themselves aside from everyone else. Coupled with the self-loathing stage, exile tends to have its roots in depression.

Stage Five: Love - Sitting with one’s self long enough and realizing that the world hasn’t collapsed, no one has died and that this revelation will not go away even if you ask it to politely finally leads to an acceptance. This acceptance of a new portion of one’s identity can only lead to a further understanding of one’s personhood and eventually love for that personhood.

E-A-S-E-L - The processs of discovering a more complete picture of one’s identity is laying the foundation and creating the scaffolding for the beautiful masterpiece that is each individual person.